Ellen DeGeneres announced during a show taping yesterday that she and her longtime girlfriend Portia de Rossi plan to tie the knot following the Supreme Court decision that people have the fundamental right to marry anyone they want.  Ellen was a little ferclempt when she made the announcement –  it was really sweet!

Jonathan Knight has come a long way since the panic attack he suffered live on Oprah Winfrey’s stage several years ago, but after watching him on the Today show this morning it’s clear he’s still working on his anxiety issues. He stood in the background during most of the interview segments and never once answered any of Lauer’s questions – but cheers to him for taking the stage before hundreds of rabid women and doing his thing. He definitely held it together.  Back in 2001, Knight shocked viewers when he had a panic attack during an Oprah episode that focused on the debilitating disorder.

For a little compare/contrast, let’s turn now to the famous show New Kids did at Showtime at the Apollo. Lean close young grasshoppers, and you can hear the audience yell “Go White Boys.”

After being hit with a rolled up newspaper for saying the N-word, Dog Chapman has been told he can come out of the garage and back into the living room. They should have at leat rubbed his nose in some poop first.

“Plus”-size model Whitney Thomson is a fake fatty! Fourfour has the skinny that the fix was in for the latest winner of “America’s Next Top Model.”

Tyra just wants to look skinny again (by comparison).

Duuuuuude. Print this out and shove it in your girlfriend’s face as fast as possible.

Hallmark’s new Memorial Day flick, ”Shark Swarm,” has “I needed the money” written all over it: Daryl Hannah and John Schneider defend the California coastline from a swarm of blood-thirsty killer great whites that attack civilians after resort developers wreak havoc on their marine environment. This promo image released by the Hallmark channel is an instant classic. Are those light sabers they’re wielding?  And why don’t they have scuba suits on?